Eyes have always been considered as the most expressive organs of the human body. Poets have written odes on them; medical professionals have done extensive research on them. Frankly speaking, even without any special training in reading body language, you are able to read many of the signals that a person is giving out by just looking at their signs.
You know that when a person crinkles their eyes, they are probably thinking hard; and you know that when a person rolls up their eyes, they are indicating their non-acceptance or unwillingness for something. Some of the signs are quite apparent, but there is so much more that the eyes can tell you. It is befitting that we start our body language reading techniques with the eyes. There is so much they can tell you, if you are only willing to hear them!
The eyes are perhaps the most expressive parts of the human body. Many people instinctively feel that the eyes cannot and do not lie. What is seen in them has to be the truth. From this widespread belief comes the familiar phrase “Look into my eyes,” which has the implicit suggestion that when this is done, the eyes will reveal the truth. Experts in body language agree: the eyes are often true reflections of a person’s inner thoughts and feelings.
What is also very fascinating is that most people seem to have an inborn ability to “feel” what the eyes are saying, and to “connect” with someone through the silent but powerful language of the eyes. One evidence of this uncanny ability is the fact that although a person may be a standing a considerable distance away, he can feel with absolute certainty that he has established eye contact with someone even at that far distance.
Another evidence is that no one has to be taught how to recognize different looks in the eyes: a glazed or blank look, a penetrating look, a surprised look, eyes overcome with emotion that are about to cry, a look that caresses lovingly, and eyes that hide something out of guilt or shame. People just know these things, out of natural instinct.
It is difficult for most people to explain how they know the exact emotion or message being conveyed by the eyes; they just know. Nevertheless, beyond the looks of the eyes that are easily recognized by practically everyone, there are other movements of the eyes that are known only by those who have extensively studied “eye language.” Below are two examples.
- When the eyes look toward the right, this means that the brain is imagining or creating certain thoughts. Thus, eyes looking at the right can mean that the person is lying, or fabricating something in his mind while he is speaking. He could also be simply guessing or telling a made-up story.
- In contrast, when the eyes look toward the left, this means that the brain is recalling or remembering something. This is a good indication that the person is being truthful. He is remembering things, not making them up.
The explanation for this lies in the so-called right-brain and left-brain functioning. The right brain is associated with creativity, while the left-brain has to do with cold facts and memory. Where the eyes are directed indicates which side of the brain is active. Thus, right looking eyes, or right-brain functioning, are creative and therefore more likely to be linked to lies and fabrications.
Left-looking eyes, or left-brain functioning, are concerned with memory and the remembrance of facts (without altering them). Detectives and crime investigators use the side movements of the eyes to help them gauge if a witness or suspect is being truthful. However, they are also aware of the fact that right-looking eyes do not always mean the person is lying.
He may just be unsure or speculating, or he simply does not know the answer to the question asked. There is a lot more to be learned about the eyes and the “volumes they speak.” It is often helpful to learn how to identify clusters of expressions—from the eyes, mouth and the whole face in general, taken as a whole—to correctly interpret facial expressions. This takes a lot of study and practice.
The role of head and face in body language
When we are interacting with somebody, it is mostly their head and face that we can most easily observe. We can look at the various signs they give out, even without making an attempt at it. That is the reason why it is so important to understand what a person’s head and face say when they are interacting with us. In this chapter, we are going to understand what a person’s head and face can tell us about what’s going on in their mind.
This is a very essential chapter of speed-reading, because you do not really need time to understand what goes on in someone’s mind when they are talking with you. There are six facial basic expressions that are universally recognized. This means that no matter what country or race a person belongs to, he naturally recognizes and understands what these expressions mean, and these are: - happiness, sadness or sorrow, disgust, anger, surprise and fear.
Scientists theorize that understanding these expressions is a genetic, rather than learned, ability that every person has. Beyond these six expressions, the face and the head can convey many other meanings and emotions. Anyone can learn about their meanings through careful study and patient observation of the people they meet or come in contact with. This is exactly how experts in body language learn to “read a person” without the need for words or verbal communication.
The head can provide very helpful hints that indicate a person’s inner emotions and thoughts. First, where the head is directed also determines the general direction of the entire body. The head can be directed forward, turned to the left or right, or backward. All these have certain meanings. In addition, head movements such as nodding also give off specific signals useful in interpreting body talk.
Excerpted from the book What Their Body Is Saying But Their Mouths Are Not Telling You.
This excerpt has been edited and condensed for clarity.
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