Adoption is when the birth parents of a child sever all legal ties to their child, and the parental rights are legally given over to the new adoptive family, who are strangers. Apart from adopting a child from your own country, intercountry adoption is also available as there are also many children from international countries who need a family.

In the UK and the USA, children are usually given up for adoption because they have been mistreated; other reasons are due to teenage pregnancy, or because the birth parents are no longer able to look after the child, or they have given up the child because it isn't the right sex, it has some form of disability, or because they simply don't want a child. There are many different reasons for wanting to adopt - if couples are unable to conceive, if they want to help others by adopting, and now there are same-sex couples who prefer to adopt. The adoption process varies from one country to another.

The ethics for eligibility can differ in each country which can include the age limit, the requirements for same-sex adoption couples, and whether a single person is able to adopt. Placing a child into care and up for adoption is free in the United States. Adopting fees for the parents vary in different countries, and even in some, to charge an adoption fee would be illegal. In the United States, for adoptions you are given a $10,000 tax credit. The new parents face many concerns in adoption.

The child's family history and their family medical history may be unknown, or kept secret until the child starts to ask questions about where they come from. This usually happens when a child is old enough to ask the right questions, or when they feel the need to 'find themselves'. There are always misconceptions about children who have been fostered and this is usually fuelled by the media. Some children are thought of as not being able to develop properly or will become problem, but that is not always the case, as children can fare well when given a new, loving home and go on to lead successful lives.

However, many children lose out and some reach the eighteen when they are too old to be adopted and are legally adults. They fall out of the system. Not everyone chooses to understand or support adoption, although Americans are experienced in it. The history of adoption can be traced as far back as the 18th Century B.C. During Ancient times it was more popular to adopt adults rather than children so that they could carry on the family heritage or to protect the family's property rights.

Men and women single or married had the right to adopt. Modern adoption laws are based on the heritage in 18th Century B.C. of the Hammurabi Code. Adopting adults was the focus in Ancient Times as a means for someone to follow in one's footsteps; whilst the Middle Ages set some ground rules with their focus on the adoption of children. Certain laws were placed in order to protect children, so by this time adoptions were dealt with by the court systems.

It was in 1851, in Massachusetts, that the first state adoption took place. Rev. Charles Loring Brace was the founder of the New York Children's Aid Society in 1853, which helped orphaned and abandoned children. He wanted to rescue these children and transport them to good Christian homes.

They were placed on Brace's 'Emigration Plan' onto regular trains called the 'Orphan Trains' for families to view at each station, until they were taken up by one of many of the wealthy farming families. Times have changed, although we still want the best for our children, although it is still sometimes difficult to know what that is. Adoption is one of the best things to have happened over the centuries, to give children without a home a good chance to find one.

Why you should choose adoption

All you need to know about adoption; is it the right choice for you and your partner, or your family if you already have children. For many people unable to have children of their own, adoption is the only answer to their prayers. It answers all the hopes and dreams of ever having a child they can call their own. Many people all over the world are not able to have children due to health reasons or who have tried I.V.F. (In Vitro Fertilization) treatment and been unsuccessful.

Some have tried May fertility treatments and still been unable to conceive. To experience so much disappointment is heartbreaking when a couple is desperate for a child. To be told by their doctor, that they will be unable to have children naturally is enough to shatter anyone's dreams. If a couple cannot reproduce adoption is their only alternative and not a decision to be taken lightly.

It takes a lot of time, research and discussions with health professionals for a couple to decide on whether this is the right option for them. For many couples, adoption provides them with any hope of raising a child they can call their own. Sometimes it is enough to find happiness in other people's children, related or not. The opportunity of becoming a family is a privilege and being parents can bring a lot of happiness and joy. Couples usually start by adopting one child, and then some years later, they may decide to adopt another.

There are other reasons for choosing adoption; some couples can conceive and reproduce, but opt for the alternative to adopt. Families used to consist of many children, up to five or more children. These days due to the cost of living and with couples both working, today families usually consist of one, two or even three children. It is only a few who choose to have larger families.

To be financially secure, having a family and working is usually important. A mother will usually take maternity leave, then return to work either part-time or full-time, however they feel as there are also childcare fees to consider.

By choosing to adopt, a couple are providing a home for one of millions of children in care around the world; children who are looking for a loving home and parents to love them. Luckily, for these children, couples who actively seek to adopt realize this need and choose this path, rather than reproducing their own. It is truly a selfless act when a couple decide to adopt and a lot of admiration for deciding to take on a child that is not genetically their own.

Excerpted from the book Adoption Made Easy by Wings Of Success.

This excerpt has been edited and condensed for clarity.

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