The following are the most basic but undoubtedly most important things that you have to keep in mind when making relationship resolutions. Follow them and start creating the best relationship ever!

The Basics

If you are just like most of the couples today, chances are your previous year has been filled with both good and bad things, happiness and sorrow, triumphs and conflicts. With the start of another brand new year, why not take some time to finally say goodbye and let go of all those not so good things that happened in your relationships the previous year? For just a few minutes, sit down with your partner and discuss of the best ways that will help in making your current relationship way better than before.

Forgiveness is the key

So that the two of you will be able to move forward for the brand new year with a positive mind frame, it is a must that forgive and forget what happened in the past. If you have long been nursing some hurt within you and you find it hard to forgive your partner before, this is the perfect time to let things go and embrace the concept of forgiving.

Refusing to forgive can be similar to a poison slowly but surely seeping through your whole being, filling with such bitterness and eventually setting us a permanent wedge between the two of you. When you forgive, it does not necessarily mean that you will condone the things done by your partner. More importantly, forgiveness means that you have finally come to peace with it in order for you to finally move forward.

Problem evaluation is a must

Take time that you evaluate the biggest problems in your relationship. For some, this might be lack of communication. For others, this can be finances and a myriad of other issues. Discuss the problem and think of ways on how you can improve things. Listen to the ideas of one another in order for the two of you to have your equal share on the decision.

Change good for the better

Talk about the ways which can help in improving the already good things in your relationship. All couples have their own strengths in their relationship. Discuss these things and turn these into a validation that signifies that the two of you are doing things right. Talk things out to make good things even better and make a vow that you will never take for granted the good aspects of your relationship.

Talk about romance and intimacy

When we speak of romance, this should encompass your sex life. There is no denying that this is an integral part of your relationship so make sure that you do not set this aside. Laugh together and be playful about this. Come up with ways on how you can make this part of your relationship better and happier.

Think of things to look forward to this New Year

Do you plan to buy your own house this year or start a family? This New Year might be the best time for you to start making some plans. Probably the two of you would like to become fitter and healthier. You can do it together as this can be a fun way of achieving a goal that you have set for yourself. Plan and cook meals together. Go for stroll together and hold hands. No matter what plans you might have, at the end of the day, having each other this New Year is the best gift that you can give to your partner.

Take care of yourself first

There are some people who end up forgetting about themselves once they become a part of a relationship. However, for a relationship to work, it is important that both parties know how to take care of one’s self for them to better take care of each other. Discover the importance of taking care of yourself first before anything else.

Self-Care is the Key for a Better Relationship

Taking care of yourself when in a relationship is as important as tending to the relationship itself. It is a must that you take care of yourself prior to fixing your relationship. Here, you can apply the old adage stating that you can never give away things that you do not have. Until you feel happy and peaceful, you will never have a happy and peaceful relationship.

If you choose to skip such steps and jump right away to your trouble relationships murky waters, chances are you will be going straight down under. This is the reason why you need to do everything in your power so that you can stabilize yourself prior to getting this over your head. Prior to confronting the core issues of your relationship, first, you need to follow the following steps in order to increase the chance of being successful.

Commit to staying okay whatever happens along the way Promise to yourself that you will still take care of yourself and remain okay whatever will happen in your relationship. Once your happiness completely depends with your partner being there by your side all the time, you will end up feeling powerless and fearful. This will then mean that there is more likely that you will be engaging in ineffective actions like pleading and begging.

When this happens more often, the less will your partner want to stick to the relationship? Why is that? A good reason for this is that your partner will see you as someone emotionally dependent and needy. The things that another person will do for your sake will still be not enough for you because you will always expect more from that person.

It is something that will not escape your partner and will make him/her fearful of being consumed and eaten up by your unending demands for care and attention. One more reason is that it can be a real burden for one person to feel completely responsible for another’s happiness. Majority of people feel the need of running away if this is the case.

The partner who tries to be everything to another will then feel anger and resentment when place in this kind of demanding position, thus snuffing out any sense of fun and playfulness that are vital to have an enduring relationship.

When you respect yourself and believe in your own capacity of thriving whether you are in a relationship or single, you will surely come from a place full of strength and empowerment. These two attributes can attract other people and provoke respect, which will then make you a more desirable and lovable partner.

Commit to staying happy with your life despite feeling miserable

There is no need for you to wait to plan some fun activities you can do on your own until you get your relationship perfect. If you want, you can join classes where you can learn interesting past times such as gourmet cooking, playing the guitar or such.

List down places in your area or others nearby that you plan to visit. Learn brand new skills, brand out, and broaden your own personal world. When you have fun and stay active, you will feel much happier and even contented with yourself. On top of that, this will make you more attractive to the eyes of your partner.

When you lead your own life with gusto, have a sense of adventure and take good care of yourself, no matter what state your relationship might be in, you will increase the likelihood of your partner wanting to spend more time with you.

Excerpted from the book Relationships Maintenance.

This excerpt has been edited and condensed for clarity.

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https://boostlane.com/p/boostlane/1008/relationships-maintenance/