RECOVERY

Recovery from drug addiction is a process of growth and development that involves the whole person. It takes time, and not only attitude changes, but lifestyle changes as well. It begins the day one attempts to enter treatment.

There are four phases of recovery which are not feelings or states of mind, rather they are major life conditions. People vary and so do recoveries. Every life takes its own form and its own time. Not everyone has to deal with every one of the items on the accompanying list or in the particular order presented. Every recovering person probably has issues that are not on the list, however most people will still go through processes like the ones described here as they learn to re-experience life in a satisfying way, without drugs.

BOTTOMING OUT: This is when people are simply exhausted. They have broken all the promises made to self and to others and feel as if there is no lower to sink. Everyone has a different bottom, but you know it when you feel it, it feels terrible.

• Until now, the person lives only for the moment and does not face reality.

• Experiences collapse of support from others.

• Experiences great pressure to change.

• Is sick and tired of the hassles, cannot continue this way.

• Is despairing and confused about where to turn.

• Asks honestly for help (perhaps several times)

• Begins to share personal feelings with a positive supportive person.

AMBIVALENCE: This is a state of mind in which a person has co-existing but conflicting ideas and feelings about something. It’s the “betwixt and between” stage when people sit on the fence about recovery. The past seems too painful to return to and the future too uncertain and challenging to feel confident about. People seriously consider the possibility of a drug-free life and may begin to feel it out. This is a phase of self- doubt and self-examination.

• Resists the need to change lifestyle and is uncertain about what needs to be done.

• Acknowledges that drug-freestyle would be better but doubts personal strength and cannot imagine self as a drug- free person.

• Distrusts non-addicted world.

• Experiences great stress.

• Has very high craving whenever drugs are available.

• Fantasizes about ability to use drugs in future, cannot conceive of never getting high again.

• Have few positive activities and friends and is uncomfortable with clean recovering people- tends to be idle and alone a lot.

• Feels guilt and shame about the past.

• Wants to think of self as recovering but is afraid

• Hides the past from others who are clean.

• Have changeable moods, feelings and opinions.

• Becomes absorbed with new values and ideas and is increasingly enthusiastic about being clean.

In the case of chemical dependency a person gets typically ambivalent about continuing with drug use versus resisting or stopping it. The ambivalent track may take any of the following:

i). I want to quit using but I don’t want to quit.

ii). I want to continue using but I don’t want to continue.

The recovering person needs to determine clearly what is ahead of him/her in case he/she makes a change and what he expects to achieve or lose in case he/she doesn’t change.

Decision Box - This is a two by two table.

In the appropriate squares, write down both the good things (benefits) and bad things (costs) about quitting. Then write down the good things (benefits) and the bad things (costs) about not quitting. When you are done, you’ll have a complete picture of all the factors influencing your decision to quit.

For Example:

GOOD THINGS ABOUT QUITTING

a). Physical Implications

 Better health in general

 Longer life

 Less chance for cirrhosis of the liver

 Lessened damage to pancreas and other organs

 Reduction of high blood pressure

 Prescribed medication can do its work without interference

 More energy

 May help you stop smoking as well

 Stronger voice- you can start singing again

 Weight reduction

 More attractive appearance

 You’ll sleep better

 Improved digestion

 You’ll be able to get back in shape.

 (Other) ____

b). Mental Implications

 Greater sanity

 Better memory

 Better judgement

 Enhanced ability to focus your thoughts and actions

 Clever mind for creative work

 You’ll be able to get more done

 You’ll free up the energy you’ve put to use conning yourself into believing that you don’t have a problem with alcohol or drugs.

 You’ll worry less, have less anxiety and stress, and feel more relaxed.

 You’ll have more time for hobbies, community work, and home improvement and so on.

 You’ll be able to concentrate on problems other than your addiction

c). Social Implications

 Better chances of saving your existing marriages/relationship, or the chance to create a sober relationship with someone new.

 Enhanced ability to make peace with parents, siblings.

 Opportunity to make more positive friends

 You won’t be so cross or inattentive with your children

 You’ll be able to enjoy a wider range of activities.

 You’ll save money.

 You’ll avoid the embarrassment, expense and penalties of legal problems connected to using, dealing, and driving under influence and so on.

 More time for family and friends.

 Improved productivity at work.

 Ability to take up your favorite sport again.

 Opportunity to redeem your reputation as a sober, productive member of society.

 Enhanced ability to plan for the future.

 (Other) ____

d). Spiritual/ Emotional Implications

 Feeling of pride in having the courage to quit.

 Chance for true happiness.

 More genuine emotional life (emotions aren’t tied to highs and lows of alcohol and drugs).

 More freedom (no longer a slave to alcohol or drugs).

 More control over your life.

 More self-confidence.

 Re-establishment of spiritual connection to God, self and others.

 Ability to pursue higher aspirations now that substance abuse is no longer a problem.

 Greater feeling of maturity.

 Opportunity to make amends toward people you’ve hurt through your drinking or drug use.

BAD THIGS ABOUT QUITTING

a). Physical Implications

 Withdrawal symptoms

 Cravings

 Missing the feeling of intoxication.

 Diminished pleasure in smoking, eating certain foods.

 Weight gain (for instance, from quitting speed)

 Sleep problems

b). Mental Implications

 Sudden inability to drown out self-doubt, regrets, guilt.

 Boredom

 Possible loss of agility and ease in writing, talking, being funny.

 End of excuses for not dealing with other problems

 (Other) ___

c). Social Implications

 End to congenial evenings in the bar.

 Your drinking/ drug friends will feel abandoned

 Endless free time to fill

 Increased bashfulness, shyness, sense of reverse.

 Intensified loneliness

 Loss of wine making beer brewing hobby

 Awkwardness and self-consciousness at parties

 Inability to entertain business people in a costumed style

 Fear that intimacy may be impossible without the social lubricant of drinking/ drugs.

 Greater sexual inhibition.

 (Other) ____

d). Spiritual/ Emotional Implications

 Diminished fun, spontaneity, sense of adventure

 Loss of self-image as a misunderstood rebel

 Inability to blame alcohol/ drug anymore.

 Need to take responsibility for your actions

 Chance of failure – as long as you don’t really put yourself to the test, you can always imagine that you will be able to quit.

 Feelings of being deprived of the high/comfort/ ease that came with your use

 Feel naked, vulnerable, unprotected.

 (Other) _____

COMMITMENT: Now people begin to act on their ideas about recovery. Patterns of drug-free living emerge and gradually things start to go right. Hard work and healthy risk-taking in doing new things, engaging in new supportive relationships, new satisfactions, and new stability in the face of problems all mark this period of major growth.

Furthermore one:

• Cuts off relationships with user friends for good.

• Begins to get rid of symbols and paraphernalia of drugs use.

• Begins to set clear practical future goals.

• Carefully develops new relationships

• Begins regular learning or a work schedule (school or job, profitable work)

• Develops techniques to deal with craving (which is declining) and quickly uses support in case of a relapse.

• Helps others as a form of self-help.

• Reveals personal past carefully to certain people and is very conscious of being a recovering addict.

• May be working very hard and have intense close relationships.

• Begins to look forward to clean social recreation and to enjoy drug-free pleasures.

INTEGRATION: This phase describes recovering addicts in their new lifestyles. It is really just another name for the universal process of finding one’s place in the world and it continues for a lifetime for every mature person.

In addition:

• Resolves guilt and can reveal past as a personal fact without shame or fear.

• Without forgetting the past, feels like a drug-free person and a part of the recovering community.

• Personal rules that prevent drugs use applied nearly effortlessly.

• Helping others becomes an essential part of life.

• Openness to growth and self–improvement becomes second nature.

• Lives each day accepting the challenges, responsibilities, and satisfactions of work, love, and respect for others.

• Is no longer stimulated by old places, events, or people associated with prior drug use.

• Social network is ever widening.